I mean hell, he doesn't even have a decent mustache.
There's a sadness in his eyes, leading me to believe
that this shot was taken moments after he realized
he'd never be half the man Tom Selleck is.
I'm pretty sure that I could grow a better mustache, honestly. Annnnyway. These "hey girl" posters read like a letter of desperation from an entire generation of straight women craving a man who:
1. has the ability to do things without being asked.
2. knows how to build/make things.
3. is good to children and animals.
4. listens.
5. is clean and well dressed.
6. is complimentary and romantic.
Hey, guess what, Normal Man. You're in luck! You, too, can attain meme-worthy status. It's easy! Just do things, make stuff, care, listen, bathe, and take your attempts at romance beyond poking your lover in the back with your erection while she's trying to sleep.
So what the gist of this Hey Girl meme is saying is that a man should be self-reliant, capable, compassionate, respectful, and romantic if he wants to represent himself as a good dating selection?! Shocking.
Yet, taking a look at My Very Worst Date, OKCupid, some of the men I know, I realize I should start teaching a class or something. The class material would be so simple to compile. It's all just common sense. The title, on the other hand, could be tricky.
Maybe:
"How to Be More Like Ryan Gosling: Refrain From Referencing Your Boner In Pick-Up Lines, and Other Useful Dating Tips"
or
"How to Be More Like Ryan Gosling: Building Bookshelves, Making Dinner, and Actually Getting Laid (Without Paying For It!)"
or
"The Gosling Technique: Self-Reliance and its Aphrodisiac Effect on Women"
or
"Hey Girl is Not Your Maid, Not Your Mommy: The Gosling Transformation"
Hmm, what do you think?
1. has the ability to do things without being asked.
2. knows how to build/make things.
3. is good to children and animals.
4. listens.
5. is clean and well dressed.
6. is complimentary and romantic.
Hey, guess what, Normal Man. You're in luck! You, too, can attain meme-worthy status. It's easy! Just do things, make stuff, care, listen, bathe, and take your attempts at romance beyond poking your lover in the back with your erection while she's trying to sleep.
So what the gist of this Hey Girl meme is saying is that a man should be self-reliant, capable, compassionate, respectful, and romantic if he wants to represent himself as a good dating selection?! Shocking.
Yet, taking a look at My Very Worst Date, OKCupid, some of the men I know, I realize I should start teaching a class or something. The class material would be so simple to compile. It's all just common sense. The title, on the other hand, could be tricky.
Maybe:
"How to Be More Like Ryan Gosling: Refrain From Referencing Your Boner In Pick-Up Lines, and Other Useful Dating Tips"
or
"How to Be More Like Ryan Gosling: Building Bookshelves, Making Dinner, and Actually Getting Laid (Without Paying For It!)"
or
"The Gosling Technique: Self-Reliance and its Aphrodisiac Effect on Women"
or
"Hey Girl is Not Your Maid, Not Your Mommy: The Gosling Transformation"
Hmm, what do you think?
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